Happy New Year!

Happy New Year everyone!

Back in 2007 with more....

Christmas Food.

I love Christmas even if I do tend to get maudlin. And the food is always excellent. Over the years, I’ve fallen into routine and been in Madras for Christmas as my Grandparents, from both sides, live there but I wasn’t able to make it this year and hence will have to eat vicariously.

When my Grandfather was alive I have recollections of large Christmas parties with hundreds of people, two bars and a mahogany dining table that fair protested under the sheer weight of food. And what a spread it was.

Post-Church breakfast, on Christmas day, was always appam and chicken stew, with a side of egg roast. And dinner, that followed the massive lunch (detailed below), is almost always from Buharis or Blue Diamond. Buharis, being past its prime (even if it did create the original Chicken 65, chicken kebab was item number 65 on their menu and no other explanation is valid.) has more or less given way to the fabulous Sri Lankan Muslim food from Blue Diamond, egg and kheema parathas, ghee parathas, mutton kurma, kotthu paratahas…oh, so good.

Yes, so on with lunch. Us being Mallu, there’d have to be some food from “Our Land”, usually a chicken curry, beef fry, fish fry, red fish curry, two vegetables, papad and some pickle, and the ‘Continental’ side would feature roast turkey, roast chicken, duck if we were lucky, glazed leg of ham, sausages, roast potatoes, gravy, stuffing, Russian salad, bread rolls and crumb fried fish. The menu almost never changed, and still remains the same, except for one year when the Grandmother decided that a roast pig would be a good addition. Minor variations are allowed, some years we have smoked salmon and the Mallu food is prone to change. But the basic nature of the buffet remains unchanged, to this day. Dessert is always a steamed Christmas pudding (with a silver coin in it, for one lucky soul to wish upon.), served with brandy butter, lemon juice and Bosoto Brother’s cream (cream so thick you could invert the tub and it wouldn’t fall.)

This year, being in Bangalore and not having access to my traditional meal, I dined at Sunny’s. They had a set menu, which featured a French onion soup or a pumpkin and apple soup (both were good. Thought the latter could have used more spice to hide the overbearingly sweet base.), starters of smoked salmon rolls, fried nori shrimp, Vietnamese rolls and grilled Shitake mushrooms (all of them, barring the rolls were very good.), a salad of warm goats cheese, green apples and romaine (a fabulous paring but rocket would have worked even better.), a pomegranate sorbet (excellent. But obviously made from juice and hence maybe a little too sweet.) and a main course of turkey served with a sweet potato puree, stuffing and cranberry jelly. (I'm betting that it was a Butterball turkey. Not bad, but I like mine more flavorful, leg meat and all. Good gravy, I can't stand the cranberry jelly, and the whole thing was too nouveau with the sweet potato crap. I wanted roast potatoes. Stuffing was okay, but politically correct as it had chicken sausage and no organ meat) Unfortunately, there was no glazed leg of ham. And the X'mas pudding was more a cake. And no cream and piddlingly little brandy butter.

But for the company, I’d rather have been in Madras.

So, what did you eat for Christmas?

Merry Christmas

The cops had closed Brigade Road to vehicular traffic on X'mas eve. I wish they'd do it more often...

Merry Christmas ya'll, have a good one and drive safe.

Opus. Christmas Special.

Last night a bunch of us went to Opus for the Christmas edition of their weekly Booze & Brains quiz. Didn't eat much apart from some all too fishy fish fingers and potato wedges.

Mark Rego managed to get atleast one question wrong, or so I firmly believe. Where is Tabasco sauce made? His answer was Mexico. Mine was the USA. He claims it's made only in Mexico and bottled in many countries, India included. I'm pretty sure he's wrong. On both counts.

A few pictures below of the special Christmas food counter Opus has set up with grilled chicken, turkey, duck and quail; roast leg of lamb and pork; baked pork rolls and glazed legs of ham, prawns and live crabs. All looks very good and maybe someone who's tried it can let me know if it's any good?

And for the record, we came third.

Pricey Dining

Forbes has a story on India's Most Expensive Restaurants. Take a look at the slideshow and pick your jaw up off the floor.

Bangalore features twice, once with this gem from "gourmet writer Ajit Saldanha" who remarks on the rise of these expensive dining haunts thus:

"I call it trophy dining. If you've got it and don't flaunt it, well, what's the point?"

Is he the best they could do when they claim to have based their list on "...recommendations from the country's top food critics, who insist the pricy menus are worth every rupee"? Which brings me to my second sore point, their sole choice for Bangalore is Zen at the Leela, which was recently visited and trashed. Resoundlingly so. So much for the food actually mattering.

My Link List

Hey! You! Yes, you dear reader!

Now that I've got your attention can I ask you to direct it to our Link Blog? Go on, take a look at it and you'll find the most interesting reads such as:

Google road maps for Bangalore and other Indian cities.

A History Of Religion in 90 Seconds.

Ever Wonder what became of Winnie Copper from the Wonder Years? Wonder no more...

Know what Drinking a Coke does to you?

Banquet Menus from the Nobel Prize Ceremonies

Heck, and that's just for this week! Go on, read it, or better yet, subscribe to it.

You know you want to...

Overheard

My colleague two tables away speaks into his phone

"Ah, Arun, where are you? Chinna veedu? Periya veedu?"

hahaha. Somehow that shit is just plain wrong.

Jobless Pics.

Would you trust them? I think not...

Empire. 3.50/5.00

Given the furore that the Imperial vs. Empire debate has caused on this blog and given that the kebab question has now been answered (49% prefer Imperial chicken kebabs to the Empire ones. I can't disgaree!) I was finally able to visit Empire. This review is of the Central Street branch. My quick take: Empire has enough, kebabs apart, to want to dine there.

Our evening began at Windsor Pub where the beer was accompanied by the usual 'snackes' followed by a short detour to, ummm, build appetite as it were.

For six of us, we ordered a lot. And I mean a lot. One grilled leg of mutton (raan), one grilled chicken, one and a half kebabs, one ginger chicken, two brain fry, 12 coin parotas, 2 kerala parotas, 2 ghee rice and sulemani to round it all of. I do believe it's the first time I've ever paid a bill of over Rs. 1000 at either Empire or Imperial. And yes, we finished it all.

Honestly, I can see myself going back soon. Not for the kebabs, they weren't a patch on the ones at Imperial. Not by a long shot. But, the grilled chicken was superb. Far better than the stuff you get at Imperial or Siddiques. The raan is also excellent, I'd be happier if the crisped the outside a bit, and such good value for money but it does have far less meat than you'd expert. Oh, the grilled chicken and the raan are best with roomalis not the KP/CP stuff. The brain was very different from the pepper fry at Imperial and it wasn't necessarily worse and is worth trying. The ginger chicken, as Chinese as it sounds, seems to be a burial ground for leftover tandoori chicken which isn't necessarily as bad as it sounds. In fact, I liked it. Enough to want to go back and try it again. Personally, I prefer the parotas at Imperial but hey, don't let that cloud your judgment. There's not much between the two. However, the ghee rice/gravy and the sulemani, are far better at Imperial.

So there, my review. Finally. Feel free to disagree/agree/comment below. I'd love to hear from you. As an aside, what's with the bombastic names? Imperial? Empire? Paramount?

More Food Reviews

Came by a new Restaurant Blog that has some good reviews on Tai Tai, Shiok and such places.

If you do come across blogs that review food in Bangalore, send me a mail won't you?

Richies. 3.75/5.00

It's tough rating a place like Richies. It really is. Not because the food isn't good, it is. But mainly because that's all that's good about it. The food. You really wouldn't go there for the ambiance, it's all fake wood, dim lighting from gaudy chandeliers and a, well ummm, an assorted crowd of diners. Much like other restaurants in the area.

But then, it's only about the food. And good God, it's incredible with one disclaimer, you need to be a carnivore, failing which, a poultry-vore.

There are only so many things one orders. Their mutton and chicken biryani cannot be beat. Not in this town anyway. And the stand-out feature is that the two are different, they don't take the easy way out. Their dal fry needs to be tried to be believed. It's good enough to make me order it, along with hot tandoori rotis. (Tip: Squeeze the oil out of the sauteed round red chilly that they add. Delicious!) The lamb in the biryani is tender, so very flavourful and never over cooked. It's brilliant. So too are their sheekh kebabs. On good days, you'll get deep fried teethar, which is similarly excellent. I like the fact that their raitha doesn't have cucumber and that you get a little portion of some very good kheer along with each order of biryani.

Their other food, the usual suspects of chicken and mutton hyderabadi/kholapuri/do pyaza etc., are also worth a shot but not in the same league as their biryani/roti/dal and sheekh kebab. Oh, and they'll also sell you the biryani, on order, by the kilogram. It's such a hit at parties.

Richies is on MM Road, about half way down. Hard to miss. But do go.

Autorickshaw

What a wonderful day to drive with nary an auto in sight!

Chunky

The chocolate or the eater?

Jobless Pics. 70.

A bus with a speed limiter. Pity it's a private service vehicle. They ought to fit BMTC vehicles with one. And a lane limiter, if one exists. Made and advertised by Pricol.

Spencer's (the erstwhile Food World) has a very interesting looking Delicatessen (Deli, you say?) on their premises. One chiller has a wide range of cheeses.

While the other has a variety of chicken and pork sausages and other assorted cold meats. They're predominantly from the Keells stable, a Sri Lankan brand. And they're pretty damn good.

Discount @ Shiok.

For two nights (and days) only, Shiok is celebrating their third anniversary and is offering:

"a discount of 15% on your ... entire bill, including [their] nice cocktails in the cocktail lounge."

Run, don't walk and make a reservation.

Oh, and congratulations!

For The Ladies; Male Models.

Chamique and I went in search of a pair of weight training gloves yesterday and landed up at the Nike Store on 100 Foot Road where I was confronted by this visage and much gentle prodding.

As impressive as these specimens are, ladies would do well to remember that they don't have a head. Then again, most women claim men don't have one anyway. Or even if they do, that they don't use it.

But they look funny undressed! Then again, so do most of us...

Either way, men, we lose.

We must protest this base objectification of our bodies. We must ask for more realistic portrayals of the male body.

Gah! Humbug!

Update: An unnamed reader sends in a story titled "Don't Misunderestimate Yourself: Why people think that rivals are better looking than they really are" from the current edition of the Economist which states:

"...that people of both sexes reckon the sexual competition they face is stronger than it really is."

Take that you immobile mannequin!

Weekend Food. Windsor Pub & Tai Tai.

Saturday night saw us at Windsor Pub (Click for previous review) after previewing the Srishti installations that were being constructed/finished at the Alliance Françaises . Our usual meal of Masala Fried Prawns (great, as always.), Chilli Cheese Toast (jumpin' jimney! These have some bite.), Masala Peanuts (meh!), Masala Pork Sausage (Spicy but a tad over cooked and consequently, mushy.) Chicken Stew and Prawn Curry with Appams/Sannas (I actually think it's the best in Bangalore but feel free to disagree in the comments...) but unfortunately no Tosca Cake to round out the meal.

[I'm trying this new format for the pictures. Please click on them for a larger view. And let me know if you prefer this format or the individual picture format]

Given the "must-visit" status that Tai Tai has garnered, I decided to lunch there on Sunday. After some confusion (they only have a buffet with an optional barbecue on Sunday, I wanted a la carte and they very graciously cooked me an a la carte lunch.) and much hunting for parking we were seated on the terrace but chose to move downstairs as the kitchen vents hot air close to there. The buffet seemed interesting, the first picture, but we ordered from their menu, which while limited is filled with endless possibility.

We started with a cured beef and rice paper rolls with roast duck, the former being outstandingly good while the latter suffered solely on account of the paper being far thicker than ideal. The main courses were a Burmese Lamb Stew served with Noodles and the usual accompaniments, a Grilled Beef with a Soya Sabayon and Steamed Sea Bass with Basil and Mango Relish. The entrees were, and I'm being repetitive, fabulous. Balance, flavour, colour; plated Asian food works at this restaurant. And how!

Dessert was far less exciting than the rest of the meal but still very good on its own merits. A Peach Cobbler with Kiwi Coulis and a Chocolate Almond Mud Pie.

I'd say go, go as soon as you can and as often as you can simply because, and I hope I'm wrong, it would be hard work to hold this level of quality for long. But for now, it's probably one of the best restaurants in Bangalore.

VAT. And Tipping.

I've been eating out a fair bit over the last couple of weeks and have started to notice something most incongruous, and ingenious, on bills that I've been presented at dining establishment across Bangalore.

But first, when I say VAT what number do you think of? 4%? 12.5%? Chances are, it'll be one of the two as it's the two most familiar numbers we have come to associate with the VAT charged in our fair Bangalore.

Now, think back to your last meal and recollect what the VAT component was. Did they charge you 4% VAT? Or 12.5 VAT? Or did they sneakily charge you a 12.5% "Service Charge"? The trouble is, if we see 12.5 on the bill and it's vaguely associated with the words Service or Tax or VAT or Charge we, subconsciously, write it off as a tax.

Today, after lunching at Tangerine, the bill showed a Service Charge of 12.5% and when I inquired, they stated that it was 4% VAT and and an 8.5% Service Charge. How bloody convenient. And now I'm left wondering how many restaurants pull this stunt with patrons being none the wiser.

And while on the subject of tipping, isn't it pathetic how badly Indians tip? There aren't too many people I know who decide the tip amount based on the bill value but rather on some perceived notions of charity and personal vanity. Leave 10%, at minimum and up to a maximum of 20%, if you're happy with the service calculated on the pre-tax amount.

Leave a comment. Let me know.

Update: MadMan points me to an old post of his where he states:

I also would like to mention that 80% of guests are unbelievably lousy tippers. The other 20% are the saving grace. When I see a Rs. 19 tip for a bill of Rs. 1581, I feel sad, even though I don't keep a cent for myself. Please be nice... tip in the region of 10% if the service was good. You will be remembered. Keep a cap of Rs. 200 if you want so you don't need to leave Rs. 500 for a bill of Rs. 5000.

Penis Envy

Much noise, and righteous indignation, has been made about the apparent, ummm, inadequacy of the Indian Male.

All I can say is:

via the delightful XKCD

Imperial or Empire?

Given the long running Bangalore feud over which place has better chicken kebabs, Imperial or Empire and given that Dilettante and I can't agree on this, I'm leaving the final say in the matter up to you, dear blog readers.

If you vote for "Somewhere Else", please leave us a comment and let us know where.